Abuse in Mental Health Therapy DOES Happen!

     When I tell people that I was emotionally abused in therapy, they often react with surprise and confusion. Abuse by a mental health counselor therapist simply does not fit our idea of what therapy is all about. But it does happen, and when it does occur, it leaves the victim shattered.
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     According to The Exploitation Link Line, TELL, they receive about 40,000 contacts from people with concerns about abuse in therapy annually. Obviously, this type of abuse is more common than you think.

     The patient goes into therapy needing help and support. They are vulnerable, and trust the therapist to help them. This relationship, unlike almost any other professional relationship, takes place in complete privacy. So, when the therapist becomes abusive, there is no witness or documentation. 

Abuse can include the following:

• Refusing to talk about a specific topic, even though the patient wishes to discuss it.
• Blatant abuse of authority by making statements like, “I am the doctor. I know what is best.”
• Advising the patient to avoid relationships with family and friends.
• The therapist telling the patient “I love you.” 
• Interacting with the patient outside of the office.

    
     Often, if the patient complains, or speaks to the abuse, the all-powerful therapist will apply labels, such as Borderline Personality Disorder, that nullifies the patient's perceptions and silences their voice. Even internally, the victim begins to doubt themselves and their reality.

     After a five-year abusive relationship with a therapist, I felt as if I simply did not exist. Finally, able to leave the abusive relationship, in desperation I made the difficult decision to reach out to another therapist for help.

     This new therapist told me she would have to take a couple of weeks to think about my story and whether she believed me. When she finally made the decision to "risk" taking me on as a patient, she told me would be watching my body language to see if it was congruent with what I was saying. If it wasn't, she would stop seeing me.

​     I was so internally nonexistent, I didn't even comprehend I didn't deserve to be treated this way.
At long last, I do understand. I have done the hard work of reclaiming myself and my soul. I wrote Mending the Shattered Mirror to tell the story of what being abused in therapy really means. I have a voice! I wanted to give a voice to all the victims of abuse in a relationship of unequal power. Most of all, I want to be heard by mental health practitioners. I want them to hear me, I want them to believe me, and I want them to understand.
 
     I truly believe most therapists are good, caring, ethical professionals who would never intentionally harm the people who come to see them. However, even minor boundary violations can have traumatic consequences for the patient.

    My story is written from the patient's perspective and reveals how very vulnerable and fragile we are within therapy, and how extremely important clear, ethical boundaries are to keep the space safe for those who seek out the help of a therapist.
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